Friday, July 31, 2009

I'm out!

Fewer things are better than setting your Out of Office replies prior to a vacation.  I have been completely high on pending vacation fumes all day, and even the toughest problem I had at work today felt at least a little bit fun.  I need to figure out how to bottle this greatness and keep some for that day in October when I'll be fed up without a vacation in sight.  (Patent it and sell it, and make eleventy billion dollars.  Yeah, that's it.)

I learned today that the kitten is ten inches long now.  Ahem.  You read that correctly...  10!   Before, we only measured crown to rump and now we measure head to toe, which makes those little pudgy legs about 3.5 inches!  So, since I always round up, she's almost a foot long!  Almost as long as a piece of paper - Letter Size.  She's taller than a bottle of beer soda.  Now she only has another *gasp* ten to twelve inches to go.

Oh boy.  :)

Pics and stories to come from vacation.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

unsightly and asymmetrical

This is an actual photograph of me, taken earlier today.  I'd like to point out the light scribbly lines that have appeared on the left side of my belly button.  Not only is this unsightly, but seemingly unnecessary...  Isn't skin stretchy? 

At least grow evenly so things distort in a symmetrical manner, kitten.  JEEZ!

the waiting game

I don't know what I'll do when the countdown is over, aside from changing diapers and rocking a lot.  I have lived day-to-day for months, waiting for a date that's five months away, and it feels so normal now.  We're heading into the twentieth week, which in the beginning sounded the way 30 years old sounds to a teenager: forever away.  But along with getting used to the waiting, I've gotten used to the little changes I've made; I don't think twice about going out to eat and not having a drink.  I don't miss eating turkey or swanky cheeses.  I've gotten used to the changing body shape and I'm resigned to the fact that none of my pants fasten.  But as I write this, I realize this could all be chalked up to my being very easily amused. 

Let's hope this amusement lasts right through labor and well into the first few weeks years decades.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

a million reasons why

I started thinking about having kids in my early twenties, and ever since I've been planning out all the things I will get to share with them: music, movies, science, the sky, why I love reading, why family is important...   All the usual stuff, I'm sure.  But today I read a passage from Catherine Newman's articles Bringing Up Ben & Birdie and I realized that I really want kids because they are hilarious.

     "And poor, napless Ben is just a weepy wreck by dinnertime. I ran a bath for him the other evening, hoping to relax him a little before bed. But then he didn't want to get in, so I got in and relaxed by myself while Ben stood naked on the bathmat and unraveled into desperate, tired shreds of himself: "Are you getting out now? Are you? Come on, Mama, here's your towel." At one point he was rooting around under the sink and emerged with a fistful of Tampax. "Hey, Mama," he said as he held them out to me like a bouquet, "do you need any of these tampons?" But then he lost his grip on them and they dropped into the tub and he had a complete nervous breakdown over it. The wrappers were all disintegrating and the tampons began blooming into their wet alien-rodent shapes, and Ben was trying to gather them up, sobbing, "What are these? What's happening?" Maybe I'll write to the good folks at Calgon and see if they want to come shoot some commercials over here ..."

I basically want kids so I can laugh at with them.  :) 

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

the good, the great and the horribly embarrassing

The good:
  • I get to eat every two hours or so, and have still lost two pounds since the beginning
  • Our nights have fallen into an easy pattern of making dinner, cleaning up and then crap TV lounging
  • Every week, I have a new tidbit of information to focus on and a bigger bump to run into things with
  • I get to drink cranberry juice when we go out
The great:
  • The movements are almost daily now
  • I've decided that the kitten is a girl
  • I sleep like an absolute rock, even after multiple bathroom breaks
  • In lieu of bars, we go to the movies most weekends (hello, theater popcorn!)
The horribly embarrassing:
  • I drop food into the neck of my shirt almost daily now
  • I am single-handedly turning the condo into a gas chamber
  • I unwittingly burped aloud at my desk the other day
Obviously, I have no insider information about the sex of the kitten, but I have a hunch that she'll be a she.  And admittedly, most of the things I've chosen to look forward to involve food and fruity beverages, but I figure there are worse things.  As for the rest, perhaps some of the embarrassing pieces would ease up if I stopped eating every two hours, but then what would I write about?  Sheesh.

Monday, July 27, 2009

old and new

Old and new.  :)
By the way, the counter above where Karen's seen cutting veggies? 
That was the only surface we had in the whole kitchen before we remodeled. 

guilty pleasures and a week left of work

After leaving the room and returning yesterday, Karen realized a very important fact: when she leaves, I immediately turn on crap TV.  I have no idea when this started, but it's absolutely true -- any season of the Real World or Big Brother, NYC Prep, Gossip Girl, or my personal fave, 90210, and I'm in a state of brain-melting heaven.  I don't often let her see this side of me, even though it doesn't surprise her in the least.  It's one of those guilty pleasures I tend to keep to myself, with a box of Triscuits and a can of pop nearby.  Well, she's kind of stuck with me...  best she knows all this stuff now, before I'm covered in spit-up!

In other news, we only have one week of work left before V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N!  (Can we, for a moment, discuss how difficult it is to type in caps, with hyphens?)  In one short week, we will be sitting lakeside, some of us with drinks in hand, soaking in the sun and basking in the non-workishness of it all.  Atwood week is one of my absolute favorite times, and I turn into a child a few days before each visit.  I still remember being so excited about an impending trip that I would routinely throw up in anticipation.  Let's hope that doesn't happen this time.  The day after we get back from vaca, we have our anatomy scan and lunch with the grandparents.  All in all, this is looking like it will be the perfect week, and I'm already riding high on just the idea of it. 

In the nineteenth week, the kitten is now about 6½ inches crown to rump, and is sprouting hair on her head!  The sites all compare her to a mango now, but I don't believe I've ever seen a mango that big.  I tried to google 6.5 inches to get a clip art picture to add to this post, but only found penis size comparisons.  Let's stick with a mango, shall we?  :)

Thursday, July 23, 2009

another thursday update

I had another routine appointment this morning - the kitten is doing very well, and moved around a lot while the doctor checked her heartbeat. Today's BPM was 150, right on target. The doctor says that everything looks great, which is always nice to hear. Next is the anatomy scan on August 7th. I wonder if we'll have to switch up our pronouns; we've been calling the kitten 'her' for months. I also learned that the swoosh of the doppler is my favorite sound on the planet, and that I am incapable of listening to it without crying. And... hyperbole is the best thing ever.

On the homefront, the kitchen remodel is complete, and we are only waiting for the new barstools to arrive. As soon as that happens, I will post pictures so you can ooh and ahh, and so we can pretend that anyone likes it as much as we do.

I originally omitted the story about the 24-hour urine collection fun, but what kind of blogger would I be then? (I can hear Carrie saying 'a blogger I don't mind reading...') For a little background, they like to test kidney function when blood pressure could be an issue, and I used to have elevated blood pressure. So I worked from home, and didn't leave the house once.  There wasn't much to it, except for the fact that Karen's brother was working at the condo yesterday and probably wondered what the hell that strange thing behind the toilet was. And, I was a little anxious about waking up in the middle of the night and forgetting (*gasp) that I was not allowed to go to the bathroom like a normal person. Everything went smoothly, and I did not sleepwalk into the bathroom once. I did, however, have a bizarre dream about the urine delivery, and how I had to drive with it in a take-out soup container. Gotta love pregnant dreams.

Next week: the last week of work before Vacation Week / Anatomy Scan Week / The Best Week EVER.

Monday, July 20, 2009

you're money, kid

In the eighteenth week, the kitten is now longer than a dollar bill.  It's amazing to me that things happen so quickly!  I have a montly appointment on Thursday when we'll get the go-ahead for our BIG ULTRASOUND!  Pretty exciting stuff, relatively speaking.  We had a fun-filled weekend with naps, movies, a local street festival, and the highly anticipated Hot Dog Garden Picnic.  The hot dogs were spectacular, in case you're keeping score.

In other news, I still have not received my Biology textbook, nor have I received the plethora of packages of clothing I ordered last week.  Shippers -- are you not aware of the importance of receiving packages in my life?  I'm suddenly a five-year old who really needs to get the mail in case that all-important card from Grandma comes today.  If I weren't so excited to start studying (and wearing new clothes?) I might be embarrassed.

p.s.  I saw a few pictures of myself from not-so-flattering angles yesterday and wonder, do all women feel unbelievably fat at this point?  I realize that I've actually lost weight since getting pregnant, and that the additional roundness is from the kitten growing, but WOW do I feel self-conscious.  I am ready for this phase to be over, thanks.

Friday, July 17, 2009

The one I look least like a house in

It is truly difficult to take these pictures yourself...

Thursday, July 16, 2009

An open letter to the guy in the white van

Dear sir,

I realize that you have places to be; we all have places to be, and we'd all prefer not to be stuck in this construction-zone traffic jam.  Perhaps you didn't notice that everyone had chosen to drive only in the left lane, since the right lane will be closed in half a mile.  Perhaps this is the first time you've driven this stretch of road in the past month, and were unaware of the closure.  Something tells me, however, that you knew something was amiss when people began to honk their horns at you as you flew past them in an effort to avoid waiting four minutes.  I wished with my whole body that no one would let you in.  I try to avoid the cost of getting angry over petty driving arrogance, but this was probably the twentieth time I've seen someone try this move.  I've imaginarily patted-on-the-back the brave souls who move their vehicles to the center of the two lanes, in an effort to block the type of behavior you exhibited today.  I wish I had thought of doing just that when I saw you creeping up from a quarter-mile back.  And it was obvious that you thought little of the anxiety you caused as I passed you after the traffic cleared, only to see you yawn with blasé indifference.

I wish you ill will, sir -- ILL WILL!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Not everyone gets jokes

Last night, I went to the farmers market again, and then we went next door to Stephanie's for homemade ice cream.  Newsflash:  The kitten loves ice cream - it was honey vanilla with carmel corn, and it was in a cone.  She's also planning a hot dog cookout this weekend with all the trimmings for a bunch of friends.  I don't know if I've mentioned my love of hot dogs, but I've only had a few that were very well cooked in the past four months.  This Sunday, I plan to have at least ELEVEN two!
Aaaaaaaand, onto the joke that I had to explain to Karen. 
**if the image didn't transfer to FB, click on View Original Post below.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Energy² -- maybe energy³

I am finally back to the old Susan... Maybe even Susan 2.0!  I signed up for school yesterday, got home and cleaned the bedroom, emptied and refilled dresser drawers and closet space with things that will fit me for the next five months, and then went out to dinner.  We met Rich and Melissa afterward, and stayed out until midnight.  I may need to repeat that: I was not horizontal the second I walked in the house from work.  Hooray!!!

The kitten is also now the size of your open hand.  Crazy to me, since three months ago the kitten was the size of a poppy seed.  I'm also starting to pop out in a way that makes me look less like a donut fan and more like a pregnant woman.  And with all this energy and poppage comes a happy, more relaxed -- and more motivated -- Susan.  Even on seven hours of sleep I feel like a million bucks.  We're Will is finishing up the last details of the kitchen remodel this week and things are finally starting to look like they're falling into place. Just in time for more chaos!

Monday, July 13, 2009

Blame the onion-sized baby

Shifting gears from the baby updates for a moment to bring you this breaking news:

I'm going back to school.

I have no idea where this came from, since the classes I have left for my degree are pretty much the standard liberal arts requirements of marketing and statistics and economics, OH MY, that I put off until now.  But it reminds me of a quote that my mom would repeat whenever I would tell her how much time I had left before graduating: The time will pass whether I'm in school or not.

At first, I was all excited to get a photography degree.  That is, until I realized that a) work will not pay for it, b) I'd start over as a freshman, and c) I'd have to take DRAWING.  So, after reviewing my transcripts and all that goodness, I will be a student again majoring in Management Information Systems.  By my estimation, I have about twenty classes, or roughly two years left.  I will graduate about when the kitten does.  But, I will not be bored in the meantime!

In kitten news, he or she is now the size of an onion, and can now blink her eyes.  Over the weekend, I felt a lot of movement all in one day.  I loved it.

Friday, July 10, 2009

aaaaaaand, we're back to fruit

The kitten is now the size of an avocado, and if you're like me, you're asking, 'Isn't an avocado smaller than a navel orange?'   I just measured a can of pop, and it's about 4.5 inches tall.  my baby is now the size of a can of pop!  Wow.  I should really write these comparisons from now on. 
Not much has changed, though I occasionally feel the kitten make vague movements.  Nothing very strong, and nothing that Karen can feel from the outside, but movement all the same.  They are getting more pronounced than they were a week or two ago, so I'm thinking I just felt them early; the other option is that I'm crazy -- either is completely possible.  And I'd like to understand, what's up with the dry eyes thing?  My eyes feel like a fan is following me around on HIGH.  Good times.
I'm told that the baby can now hear my voice, so I'm singing a lot.  I must say, it's nice to have a captive audience!  Still tired most days by about 3pm, (and still taking a 15-minute nap every afternoon) but not that horrid marathon-tired feeling I had.  I also got a pair of jeans from eBay, and I love them.  Between the ones I got a few weeks ago and my belly band, I'm set.  (Or so I think.  Mwah ah ah.)
Yesterday, one of my friends brought me a vanilla Frosty, which was a pretty nice gesture.  She said that people used to get them for her when she was pregnant, and I've decided to try to milk this for as much swag as I can.  :) 
Thanks, Jay!

Monday, July 6, 2009

Weekly update

There is very little going on that isn't pregnancy-related for me these days.  Crazy dreams have become the norm, and it's a good day when they don't completely freak me out before I get out of bed.  (Case in point: thin four-foot-long snakes that I was pulling out from underneath my fingernails.  I couldn't make this stuff up...)  I've also learned that leaning over isn't quite what it used to be...  It's like I have a pillow in my lap that's painlessly keeping me from reaching things.  I've lost some weight since my pregnancy started, so even though I feel like a house, apparently I'm not officially house-sized yet; we'll see if that trend continues -- yesterday, the kitten desperately wanted some potato chips, so I'm not holding my breath.

Here is where I'll rant about maternity clothes.  First of all, I understand that people are excited to show off their bumps, but if my bump is very barely-there, why accentuate it?  I bought a few tops and have been wearing them more often, and WOW do they make me look huge.  I'm sure they'll look darling when I'm beach-ball-esque, but I'm not used to them yet.  Also, why is it that pants are either too small or too big?  My old jeans are just snug enough to be truly uncomfortable, and my maternity jeans fall down just enough to show that lovely skin-colored belly band when I walk.  (Skin-colored?  Really?  Couldn't make it, I don't know...  NAVY?)  In the grand scheme, these are petty concerns, but I enjoy ranting almost as much as I enjoy wearing pants that don't descend to my knees.

Three weeks until our next OB appointment, which means 3-4 weeks until our anatomy scan.  YEY!!!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

holy moodiness, Batman!

I was feeling a little bit sad for a few days.  I've had little to no energy for weeks, and by yesterday, it started to feel like more than just being a little sad:  I started to feel like I did when I quit smoking - kind of anxious, and just thoroughly ungood.  I was dreading making dinner, dreading sitting lifeless on the couch for another night.  I was googling depression in pregnancy, certain that I'd be grumpy and unhappy for the next five months, and then --uh-oh -- even after!! 

Stop yourself, Susan. 

When I got home, I saw signs for our local farmers market.  I grabbed my iPod, walked over there and dropped $50 on good local stuff: tomatoes, kale chips, pork chops, zucchini bread, fresh pasta, and a little bundle of daisies and mint.  I had no idea I'd have that much fun shopping in a park, but I was like a new girl. 

And continue to be a new girl today.  I'm in a superb mood...  ON FIRE good, like I have been drinking gallons of caffeine, won the lottery and woke up and exercised.  I'm trying to just enjoy it, but I had to write it down for those days that are likely to revisit, when I'll find myself feeling like dirt.  Everything changes, and apparently, makes up for making you feel blah by giving you more energy than you had before you were pregnant. 

Maybe I'll clean the bathroom when I get home. 
*smirks at Karen*...  Maybe!